06 August 2009

Parenting Beyond Two


“Who’s clearing,” you’d often hear me ask a few minutes after dinner and get varied replies each day. Varied, because there would be three to four possible kids who’d be tasked for the chore, or a team of two. Each of the ten kids in the house has a chore, you see. That is, save for the youngest, who is only three years of age.

Yes, there are ten children in the house where we currently live. Two of which are our own, and the eight are those of my sister-in-law’s. She and her husband (and yes, their brood of eight) have welcomed us with open arms into their home when we decided to migrate to New Zealand.

People who discover this fact usually react with eyes almost popping out, raised eyebrows, and jaws dropped down. True, it may not be the common scenario for any family, Filipino or otherwise, but it used to be back in parents and grandparents’ days. My mom had 11 siblings, my mother-in-law has eight, and my father-in-law has 11.

It’s a challenge for any parent to raise children and to raise them well. Hubby and I have only been blessed so far with two, and they can test our parenting skills to the limit. Thus, I take my hats off to my sister-in-law and her husband, who, despite the trials they may face in rearing their kids, continue to do so quite admirably.

So when my sister-in-law went to the Philippines with one of her children for two weeks, we didn’t have any problem running the household without her. Of course, it helped a whole lot that she prepared a two-week schedule of tasks for each one, printed it out, and posted it on the fridge as our guide. I sat down with my eldest niece and planned the menu, as well as shared the cooking responsibility with her for lunch and dinner. My husband took care of buying groceries with the assistance of our five-year-old daughter and other times with one of our nieces. Watching over the younger ones during the holiday break was managed by the two eldest kids, who also took turns baking cookies and brownies; our son and his best friend-cousin cleared the dining area after mid-afternoon snacks; our daughter and her playmate-cousin set the table for dinner. The true challenge lied on getting the young kids to take a bath on time to make sure there would be enough hot water for everyone. When kids play, they put their whole heart and mind to it and getting them to stop to take a bath can be quite a feat.

There would be rough play, quiet time, accidents, spats, but generally a whole lot of fun. With ten kids in the house, they all share, take turns, help each one out, and look after one another.

And though it may seem like the inside of the house perennially gets hit by a typhoon, the abundance of love, fun, and laughter provide us peace.

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